It's nearly christmas. Lindsay says she hates it and Clare's cancelled it at school. Brian and Kurt get a card addressed to Mr and Mrs McKenna and inside it says it's to Kurt and Briony. Brian wants to know why he would be the wife and Simon tells him it's because he makes more effort and does all the cooking and cleaning, lends Kurt money and drives him around all the time whereas Kurt is lazy and selfish and never remembers his keys. Brian then tells Kurt he doesn't think they should be best mates anymore. Kurt is shocked but pretends he doesn't care. He then spends most of the night looking for the pub in the wind and rain and then gets locked out the flat as he's forgotten his keys. The next day he finds his keys, cooks his own breakfast and gets a bus to school which gets him there quicker than Brian. He tries to be best mates with Matt even though Matt doesn't want to know and then tells Brian that during one of the mock exams he and Matt played Paper War, a game they made up and said they'd never play with anyone else. Brian's upset and feels guilty and wants to be best mates again but Kurt says no. But later when they are doing an exam together they end up playing Paper War and become friends again.
Clare sets up a staff swear box. If they swear they have to pay. Bob ends up paying loads but after a bit he stops swearing. Liz keeps trying to catch him out and even says he can pay a one off amount and swear as much as he likes but he's like a changed man and refuses. However, when he finds out the Maths department have got their mock results in before him, he swears accidently and then can't stop. He has to give Liz a lot of money and the others have their own christmas party with it in the pub.
Days of the week captions:
Thursday - on a placcard
Friday - on the front of a bus.